Just Thoughts

I learned yesterday that Bob Vest had passed away. This was so profound for me and many others. He was our guru. He didn't just instruct us in herding. We got life lessons, too.

After my husband died I had a hard view at death. I made jokes about it and laughed at it. I don't know what has caused me to change my view. There have been several deaths since then that had touched me. There was Reba, Fly's grandmother. Sure she was JUST a dog, but she had so much personality and I never even met her. There was Jim's mother's death, six months ago. There have been others too numerous to mention. I feel hollow after these deaths and just don't know what to feel or how to feel. Maybe, it is grief. It is an intangible feeling something I can't quite put my finger on.

One of my goals was to take Fly to a Bob Vest Clinic and show him that we can do it. My one and only time to participate in his clinic was a disaster. It was 3 days of me being stupid. I knew what he was trying to tell me and I couldn't accomplish it. I was in Fly's way and I was in my own way. I am better than that. I was embarassed and depressed. I let a ewe get Fly. I saw it coming and I let it happen. I didn't protect my dog. I cried all the way home that night. We tried working ducks and I kept getting in the way. I hope Bob is looking down from the great trial field and seeing that we CAN do it.

Lastly, thanks Bob for the hint about the piece of rigid insulation. It is the best thing. I am naming my piece the Bob Vest Memorial Foot Warmer.